I did not vote in the referendum that was held in Ireland on Friday. It asked whether or not homosexuals should be allowed the same rights in marriage as heterosexuals. Why not vote? I am not an Irish resident, I have no voice in the form of a vote here.
I do have an opinion though.
I agree with the 62% of voters who ended up securing marriage rights for Irish homosexuals. And I have found the arguments that I have listened to from the people who support the “vote no” campaign weak. Too weak to provide justification for voting “no” other than an inability to see beyond an outdated definition of “normal” and a complete ignorance in the face of acceptance and change.
So:
– To the poster that tells me a child needs the love of her mother for more than nine months: two lesbian mothers would be double the love then or not?
– To the poster that tells me a child deserves a mother and a father: with an inability to conceive together, homosexual couples will not make the decision of having a child lightly or by accident. That child will be loved by his/her parents. Both of them, because they will have definitely wanted him/her.
– And on that note, to the posters that mention surrogacy: this is not even the question of the referendum. Surrogacy is another issue. Because if you oppose surrogacy you also oppose heterosexual couples who may undertake it. Homosexual marriage is not a synonym to surrogacy.
– To the poster that claims “let us not redefine marriage”. If we stick to your words, marriage in Ireland, like much of Europe, would still be undertaken to secure an economic liaison and only in the rarest of cases in an act of love. Most marriages would be arranged. We could even expand our outlook a little and look back to to the Romans, were the minimum age for marriage for a girl was twelve years of age. “Let us not redefine marriage” – what exactly are you trying to say?
– And finally to those who continue to return to the idea that “it just isn’t normal”. Let me tell you this: I am left handed. I did not choose to be a lefty. In fact, I used to play tennis with both the left and the right hand, until one day I decided on the left hand. It just felt right, even though it was definitely the left. Has anyone ever questioned me on being left handed? Have I ever been told I am “just not normal” because I do not write with the hand that the great majority of the world uses? Never. Not once. Yet a little over fifty years ago I would have been ‘encouraged’ to change my ways to match right handed people with the help of a wooden stick and watchful eyes. Had I been born in 1946 and not 1996 I would have been “not normal”. But this is 2015 and we two can talk and I could write down my number for you without you even thinking that this left hand “just isn’t normal”. Because in the end, being a left handed person is only a part of who I am. Yet it is a part that I cannot change. Being gay is a part gay people cannot change about themselves. Nor should they feel the need to. Because what we label as “just not normal” one minute can be perfectly “normal” the next. So in the end, what is “normal” anyway? And to twist your brain just a little further: why would you even want “normal” in the first place?
Helena Is On The Road 